8/26/2008 - Chica Boom brings you Elena Rivera, Sochee Mala — Elena Rivera's got this interesting tattoo on her right shoulder that does magic tricks. Now you see it, now you don't. Which presents a dilemma for boyfriends who have sworn they banged her the night before in some cheap ghetto motel, only on the next date to question their eyesight and relative sanity. Elena also finds it a very useful useful device for stickups and the inevitable police lineup. "She looks just like the girl who jacked up the gringo in the parking lot, officer. But that girl had a tattoo!" See? You can get away with all kinds of murder, have fun and make a good living in the process. Unfortunately, Elena will never let on where she got her artwork.

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8/23/2008 - Cum Eating Cuckolds brings you Katia — For some, a cuckold is that little yellow bird that goes inside of a clock and comes out every hour on the hour. For Katia it's much more. Cuckoldry is her version of high voltage crank- it's what gets her going, and it's her sense of balance in a very fucked up world. Sometimes when Katia gets up in the morning and is a ball of bad nerves, she plans novel ways how she can humiliate her husband. Besides him paying the bills and listening to her bitch all day, of course. Katia's got this friend Leroy. He's a Democrat, and she fucks him on the side. Only her hubby didn't know about this arrangement. And if told, he wouldn't have believed it because he'd have bet on lovely Katia's fidelity. He lost the bet. And when you have to suck a black man's bleach out of your wife's lying ass, those election wagers can be murder.

8/19/2008 - Revenge is a Bitch brings you Monica Foster — Monica Foster was never fond of the smell of man ass on her fingertips to begin with. Even though she was always willing to help out with a prostate massage, Monica hated herself in the morning for being the good sport. Because once that odor gets under your fingernails, it lingers there for days through soapy water and liquid bleach. And the more you do it, well you can figure that out. Then a friend of Monica's suggested she stop being an idiot and watch a few of those strap-on movies. It was as though she had attended one of those mind-rearranging seminars. The placid Monica now became this snarling she-devil, and her mind processed simple prostate requests in a much different way. Monica's now a better woman for it, and her hands smell a lot better, too.

8/18/2008 - Inseminated by Two Black Men brings you Emma Heart — Emma Heart is as cute as cute can be. Especially when her adorable face blows up to the size of a volleyball whenever she consumes interracial whistling stick. Emma says she learned this trick from her grandmom- that by stretching the mouth and other orifices to capacity and beyond- the jaw will remain firm , the cheeks will stay flush and the love box will gush forth with sweet soul music. If Granny is right, only remains to be seen. But Emma wonders how, if the old bat is passing along this advice, what mom's mom did for sport back in her day. Jazz musicians? Negro league ballplayers? Janitors named Lightnin'? Emma suspects maybe there's more to talk about than beauty tips.

8/16/2008 - Revenge is a Bitch brings you Erika Vution — Erica Vution is capricious, beautiful and dangerous. Her beauty is complicated by a collection of nuances and subtleties. And therein lies the danger. Because not so subtle is the fact that Erica likes to give a man's nuts a good, playful whack now and then. It empowers her, she says. Of course the man whose nuts are being whacked might have a different view on the subject. Ordinarily for Erica, this unusual display of affection is only the beginning of a greater adventure. A journey into the Heart of Anus, if you will. Writer Joseph Conrad wrote about the same thing. Except his publishers made him change the title and contents of his book. Conrad knew what it was like when a lonely man got near a strap-on.